3 Simple ways to prevent burn out this season
I was chatting with someone the other day about the concept of relationships being like bank accounts:. We “invest” in the account when we do something to support the relationship (i.e. kind words, acts of service, quality time, etc…) and we make withdrawals when we don’t invest in the relationship or need something from it (i.e. working too many hours, canceling plans, calling in a favor, etc..). Like any account, the relationship gets into trouble when there are too many withdrawals and not enough deposits.
My friend said, “I think the account that’s most overdrawn right now is the one I have with myself.” I thought that was profoundly insightful. I know we have a relationship with ourselves, but I had never considered this as a personal metaphor before.
If you can relate to that sentiment, keep reading.
Spending quality time with friends and enjoying the lights of the season.
When my personal account is overdrawn, I don’t have the bandwidth to invest in my most precious relationships. It’s almost as if the bank closes out my emotional accounts because of too many overdrafts. This season, I’ve made the commitment to the following recurring deposits in my personal well being account:
surrounding myself with light (candles, holiday lights, etc…)
daily meditation and breath work
journaling
choosing presents that are gifts of quality time rather than physical gifts
Don’t ask me how it works, but when I invest in myself, I actually have more energy, time, and money to invest in the other relationships that are important to me. It’s been fun to watch how these practices have made me more playful, joyful, and peaceful this season.
Are you struggling to keep your “personal” account
in the black this holiday season?
It’s really easy to over-extend ourselves this time of year—-our literal bank accounts, our calendars, etc….
Do you find yourself saying, “I don’t have the (time/money/fill in the blank to do…….” (whatever it is that helps keep you in right relationship with yourself?)
Here are a couple of simple tips to make sure you don’t overdraft your personal account this holiday season.
Take 5 minutes and write down all the things that bring you energy. Don’t forget the day to day things like quality sleep, drinking enough water, eating; the free things; the really simple things like taking a deep breath, praying or meditating for 5 minutes, doing your favorite yoga asana). See how many you can do each day.
Replace phrases like, “I don’t have the time to take care of myself,” with “I haven’t been making the time to take care of myself.” (If you’d like, you could even add in, “And today, I’m going to remedy that by_______.”) Small changes like the language your choose moves us from being the victim of our story to being the protagonist. This can be really uncomfortable at first because we realize all the times we’ve said “no” to our needs, but in the end, it can help us feel empowered in the choices we make.
Recognize that every time we say “Yes” to something, we are saying “No” to something else. If I say ‘“Yes” to this holiday party, I may be saying “Yes” to spending time with dear friends, and I may be saying “No” to sleep, the time I had set aside to recharge my batteries at the end of a long week, etc…. Ask yourself, which is most important for your well being right now?
Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. If you have a tendency to say “Yes'“ to others and “No” to yourself, it won’t be long before you don’t have anything to give those you love either.
This world needs you to shine your light brightly, so please let me know if I can help you get back into the "black” in your personal bank account. I’m here for regularly group classes, private yoga, life coaching, reiki, and more.